There is a moral to the story...

Wednesday was a day like any other day.  Kimbo had decided to ride his bicycle to work and I got the car to run errands.  Around 4 p.m. I get a distress call to retrieve him at his place of employment.  Apparently, he had stepped off a ladder and tweaked his knee.  Because it was bothering him he did not want to ride his bike home and possibly mess it up further.  Anyone knowing Kim, knows that the only thing holding his little bird legs together is bailing twine and bubble gum.  So, I toss the kids in the car and set out for Dryden.  Upon arrival, I offer to put his bike in the car but was instructed to leave it behind.  In a hurry to get home, I didn't think twice about it.

Thursday morning I agree to give Kim a ride to work.  I had a date to spend the day with two of my favorite ladies; Sara Diamond and Robin Nash.  The plan was to drop Kim off; pick up Sara, and proceed to Interlaken for the day's festivities.  Little did I know what was shortly in store for me.

Despite the chill and gloomy appearance, I was excited to get my day started.  I had my shit together and everything was on schedule.  I dare say I was a bit giddy!  As Kim and I began our journey, we joked and laughed at any number of stupid things.  Oh, yes!  It was to be a good day!

Still chuckling and being stupid, we spot a plethora of turkeys grazing in a nearby cornfield.  Kim says to me jokingly, "Hahahaha, drive straight through that field and hit those turkeys!"
I reply, "Hahahahaha, don't be stupid!"  "Look!  One is running out to the road to meet us!"  And, sure enough, one was!

We watched the big ass bird crossed the field till it got to the ditch where we saw him slow down.  What we didn't see was the turkey in the ditch who got scared by his buddy.  He leaps out of the ditch as if he's going to take off but couldn't quite decide which way he wanted to go.  That's when Kim says, "Hahahaha, hit 'em!"  At that exact moment the stupid bird chooses to fly straight into the windshield!  Smash!  In my astonishment I quickly pull over to assess the damage done to my vehicle.  I look at Kim to gauge his reaction to this event and he must have been holding his breath because the next thing he screams is, "FUCK!"  I, myself, didn't even know how to react.  On the one hand, I wanted to laugh my ass off.  But, on the other hand, my windshield was totalled! 

So, I did the only thing I could think of and kept my mouth shut.  I suppose this was a good thing because Kim was standing in the middle of the road waving his hands and repeatedly screaming, "What the fuck?"  I realized then that he didn't see the humor in the situation.  I, personally, felt like karma had just kicked me in the ass!  See?  That's what you get for all the joking around!  Who's laughing now?

Meanwhile, Kim starts looking up and down the road for the bird we thought we had pulverized.  Needless to say, the whole turkey herd had disappeared without a trace while he was screaming and shouting.  Even the dead turkey managed to drag himself out of the line of fire. With no trophy to be found, he plucks a few stray feathers out of the windshield and promptly says to me, "Fuck, I can't even ride my bike to work!"



And that, my friends, is the real moral of this story.  Not, fooling comes to crying or watch what you say, but... don't EVER leave your bicycle behind!